I have an excuse.

I know you've been waiting in rapt anticipation, wondering "do they have cold OJ? Is their milk still fresh?" Well, I have good news. Last Wednesday at 3:30 p.m. the fridge guy finally showed up with a tiny box of parts that probably cost around $5. After twenty minutes of work -- five of those involved pulling out the refrigerator and accessing the back panel -- he fixed the damn thing. I have a nasty-gram ready to go to LG because their customer service sucks.

So, with that out of the way, Gina decided to go into labor. By 9:03 a.m. the next morning we had this 8lb 10oz squirming scream machine:

He arrived right on his due date, December 7. I like punctuality.

Losing (my) cool

Two weeks ago, our 9-month-old refrigerator – the refrigerator that replaced the lovely harvest yellow model that came with the house – began making a funny noise, similar to a Harley Davidson taking off in the far distance. I knew right away that it was a matter of days before it stopped working altogether and, needless to say, I was terribly annoyed. After all, this was a refrigerator recommended by Consumer Reports and now it was suddenly and inexplicably making a terrible racket in my kitchen. So, shirking my responsibilities as a husband, I had my wife placed the dreaded call to the LG service department.

First, they needed the model and serial number to open a service ticket. She was calling from work and had brought everything but the serial number with her, meaning one of us needed to call from home later. But the customer service rep assured us that once we called back with the serial number, service would come within two business days. As soon as we arrived home that evening, my wife called LG once again with the serial number, at which point they told us they couldn’t arrange for service because of our location. Instead, they gave us a few local service outfits and told us to call. Good luck.

So I called the appliance dealers, left messages, and we finally arranged for someone to come out and diagnose the problem. Four days after it first started making a noise, the guy shows up and tells us that, yeah, LG ‘fridges seem to have this problem. He needs to order parts from LG, and that usually takes a week. We’ll call when the parts arrive. That was a week-and-a-half ago, and still no parts.

I have a wife who is ready to give birth, and currently we’re living out of four coolers stashed outside on the porch. Last night, after I called LG and tore several vocal chords explaining with increasing frustration why I was so upset, we went and got a small 4.5 cubic foot fridge so at least we could keep milk from going bad. It totally confounds me in an era of FedEx and DHL why they can’t get the parts out quicker. For crying out loud, I can buy shoes online and have them delivered the next day!

We bought the LG ‘fridge from Home Depot, which was a stupid move. I now see why people opt to buy from an appliance dealer that offers service. When we finally get around to redoing the kitchen, I'll defintely take that route. As it stands, I’m assuming we’ll be without a fridge until some point next week.